Put Away the Ores

With the new month comes a new virtue to learn for my church's children's ministry. We're talking about Hope.

We've had some tough virtues to try and teach 2nd and 3rd graders. The last four weeks, our virtue was "Fairness". I think we wasted a great chance now. The lessons mostly didn't make sense and were straining to teach something about fairness with Bible stories that really dealt with something else. Given the proper time, it seems like we should have taught the kids about how life isn't about everyone getting the same thing. That is usually how we envision fairness. However, to use our pastor's words, the story isn't over. That is what can give us hope for the future and hope for right now. We, as humans, are going to screw things up. We screw ourselves up, we screw our children up, we screw up our siblings, our parents, our friends and those we perceive as enemies. A lot of times we do it without even trying. Our hope doesn't lie in man though. Our hope is with a God that is making everything new.

I know what it is like to lose hope. I've been there. I've been on the edge looking down after putting my faith in things and people and this world. I thought I could swallow my pain if I had enough booze to wash it down. I had known of a God who I didn't just drift away from...I put the ores in the water and paddled as hard as I could. I was a cynic and a critic. I played the games with logic and dared anyone to prove me wrong. I was an enemy of God and those who claimed to be godly. Nothing made me want to puke more than listening to two-faced "Christians" spew venom at those with different views and lifestyles and beliefs. Hearing them pluck verses out of context to justify their own views and prejudices with their WWJD bracelets and icthus emblems...what a joke. Hypocrites. I didn't want to associate with any of them and I didn't want to associate with God. So, I rowed my boat not so gently down the stream, making sure to take a moment every so often to give a middle finger to those on the shore. It wasn't long before I couldn't see land anymore though. It wasn't long before I was a new kind of lonely; wanting desperately to be left alone and desperately to be pursued and found and brought back home. I wanted God to fight for me and show me He loved me and tell me 'Everything is going to be alright'.

I'm so glad He did.

I'm so glad He does.

I'm so glad He will.

I used to think the church was full of hypocrites, but not anymore. I've put my faith in God now and that is where my hope lies. I have stumbled enroute to my destination and I will no doubt take more wrong turns in the road ahead. Getting to my destination doesn't rest in my hands though, but in the hands of a loving and faithful God. I don't know His plans for me and I won't know the full picture of my life until my time on this world comes to pass. The story isn't over yet, and I still have a lot to work on so I don't help push someone else out to sea. There is a reason God sent His son Jesus to walk the walk for us. We can't do it on our own. We screw things up. Whether out of stupidity, pride, shame or so many other things, we continue to sin as we walk with Jesus. We live as hypocrites in this life, hoping for the redemption and cleansing the new earth and new heaven will bring.

The church isn't full of hypocrites though. There is always room for one more. And the God of heaven and earth is desperately seeking you too.

So many things to learn...

The joy of your own place.


Diving into a good book.



Looking at the world...
in a whole new way.



Not always getting our way.





Partying a little too hardy. (This wedding had an open bar)



Keeping up with the latest fashions.

I Choo Choo Choose Jessica

Today is Saint Valentine's Day and sure, it is a commercial holiday reinvented to boost the sales of card companies, chocolatiers, flourists, jewelers and the like, but the fact remains that ignoring this "holiday" even on the soundest of principles just makes you look like an ass...if you're a guy.

All that aside, I just wanted to say that I love my wife. She is my best friend and a true soulmate. I love her because of everything she is.

She is beautiful and sweet

smart and funny

dedicated and loving

a great mom and a great wife.

It doesn't take a special day for me to recognize this although sometimes I forget to let her know how important she is to me. Frankly, I should tell her every day...twice a day!

But since I don't, let me take this opportunity to say:

Jessica, I couldn't imagine my life without you. Thank you for granting me the incredible priviledge of being your husband a little over 7 years ago and thank you for putting up with me ever since. I love you so much and look forward to every day the God has planned for us to be together. Happy Valentine's Day!

My Two Cents

This month we are working with a budget so we're trying to pinch our pennies. This is new for us. We're only six days in and already there are things we didn't foresee like needing a new bulb for the headlight or a first X-Ray for Olivia.

I'm still excited to work towards something a little more tangible like getting out of debt. It is a number, an amount. I can break it down into monthly payments. I can figure out how long it will probably take. That doesn't mean it is simple to do, but progress is much easier to measure and see.

Trying to be a better person...

a person of God, for God, with God

a loving husband

a caring father

a sincere and safe friend.

These things are not so easy to break down and sometimes even harder to know if I'm even moving in the right direction.